I was in the middle of doing a Supernatural marathon while I am jobless, but I’m taking a break after one episode LAWL. Gosh, Supernatural is not something I can watch alone… but Dean’s smile and Sam’s dimples makes it all better ohhohohoho…

I googled ‘dean winchester’, I swear!

Anyways something happened while I was watching that first episode of my Supernatural marathon…

-                   catsbeon.                                anime/supernatural marathon says:
*fuck
*i was watching supernatural
*then something form the top bunk drops onto my head
*ASL;FJASDLFJSLFJSJS
【陽菜】              「もし、孝平くんのことを忘れてしまっても… …何度も何度も、恋をするからね」     says:
*ROFLMAO
*ROFLMAO
-                   catsbeon.                                anime/supernatural marathon says:
*GOT SO SCARED
【陽菜】              「もし、孝平くんのことを忘れてしまっても… …何度も何度も、恋をするからね」     says:
**HUG*
*cause its hug a viet day
*=(

Yeah~ now I’m super-paranoid.. Thanks for being there for me to rant ^^. AND HAPPY HUG A VIETNAMEE [yes, Vietnamee] DAY TO EVERYONE!!! <3

Oh yeah, I gave up on my 50k word story for nanowrimo 2009. Second time in a row now. Let’s hope I’ll make the mark next year!!! Note to self: DO NOT do a school daily life theme. It proved as a failure in my past two nanowrimo experiences. Create my own world to live in for that month~

Okay back to shitting myself. Thanks for reading!

*catherine

First year of uni has finally ended for me last Friday! Been over-celebrating it but I guess I deserved it. To be honest I don’t think I’ve ever worked so hard in my life.

It’s been a while since I’ve updated on my life so far but… despite all the whinging and complaining about my course, I’ve decided to stick with it. It’s one of the courses where I can find a shred of fun in what I’m doing, and all is possible with the wonderful friends I have made this year. However I still get put down by the whatever competition there is within our classes, as with everything else in life I guess~

So yeah I am now darker from two trips to Chelsea Beach to celebrate the end of I.D first year! The trips themselves can be summarised in the photos I posted up… somewhere… quite stalkable but if you’re my friend you’d know where to find them… [in the process of reading Dan Brown's The Lost Symbol and I'm kind of iffy about internet privacy for some reason... O_O].

Anyway I love karma. I just hope karma loves me back…

On our second beach trip, I found a lost phone in the toilet. Remembering the time when I had my phone stolen, how frustrating it was, I looked through the lost phone for a valid contact person to notify them about the lost phone. Unfortunately out of about ten contacts only one is a person, her grandma. The rest was phone service numbers. I wasn’t aware if she had any credit in her phone so I used my phone to send a text message to her grandma, saying that a relative has lost her phone, just thought I’d let someone know of its location. I left the phone in the toilet where I had found it and went back out to the ocean.

A while later, her grandma called me to confirm the details of her granddaughter’s lost phone. I told her I just left it where I found it so she can go and get it herself [I didn't want to deal with strangers haha]. About an hour later when my friends decided to head off to the toilets before heading home, I checked the toilets to see if the phone was still there. It wasn’t, and I hoped that some random didn’t take it.

When I had reached Flinders St Station, my phone rang with an unknown calling ID flashing on the screen. I answered the phone and the girl spoke to me. She told me she got her phone back and thanked me. The conversation lasted only less than a minute but it made my day. Such a polite little girl. The seemingly shallow world suddenly seemed like a better place.

There’s no such thing as ‘hopeless’ without ‘hope’ itself.

*catherine

Intro to the 50k story I’m writing for nanowrimo09. Whee!

Just a note that I don’t care about proofreading and grammar. The idea is to write a story and who cares if it doesn’t make sense – you wrote bullsh*t the length of a novel! GO YOU.

Please don’t bother to correct me or comment with ‘it doesn’t make sense, you should blah blah blah…’ because, to those of you who are the English Police of the internet, I’ll say it now – I DON’T CARE. <3

Characters:

Akamine Kyou 赤嶺　鏡　- main girl
Tsubaki Saika 椿　さいか　- another girl
Akiyama Kaede 秋山　楓　- the loverboy
Panda-kun パンダーくん　- the other boy

Enjoy! <3

TOTAL: 602 WORDS

—–

I really don’t know what to write so I guess the first step to take is…

THIS.

YES I DID IT.

There are so many things I’ve accomplished in life that I am proud of (bear in mind I am a person of pride) and many of it was just simply taking the first step. But really that first step is quite pointless if it doesn’t have any steps to continue on the initial step. I mean you don’t just stop when you take a step forward – that just looks retarded.  When normal people stop walking, they stop with their feet side by side. Theoretically, it requires a half step forward from whichever the rear foot was. In other words , a person doesn’t stop walking forward suddenly. They gradually stop unless they’re playing a game of ‘Jack and the Beanstalk’ or ‘What’s the time, Mr. Wolf?’. Ah, primary school days.

It is a shame for me to say that I am a half assed person who only takes the first step, and hardly any steps come after it at all. Even if it meant it was for the person I cared about the most. See I have this pessimistic belief that no one can put another person’s life before them, unless it was for their own self benefit. Or that when someone puts their life on the line, there is a shred of regret or hesitance but by the time they realize it, it’s too late. Now this may come as an offence to fellow loved ones and all but forgive me for not understanding the meaning of selflessness in this kind of corrupted world. Actually, don’t forgive me because it would be selfless of you to do so. Save it for something else.

Although I do like the sound of the word ‘everlasting’, it doesn’t sound as fulfilling as I had hoped. It’s like a glass of water half full – it doesn’t last long as a full glass of water no matter how you look at it. The meaning of the word everlasting could be better applied individually to the elements on the Periodic Table for a number of reasons. One – there is equal exchange in every chemical reaction (forgot the proper term for it)which ensures that nothing disappears into thin air… but even if it does, air is something since it’s composed of 70% nitrogen and hopefully you know the rest.

There are so many things that I don’t believe in. Sometimes people try to exaggerate to make things sound better than they are, but I end up being more skeptical about it. It’s not to say that I am closed off about that particular topic, I still allow my beliefs to change although not so readily. I am like a rock… living under another rock. A photo can look different to me each time I look at it and my perceptions and ideals change with time.

Time is the universal dimension, the man-made creation based on the changing patterns and cycles of nature that links our existence and those of others around us together. It is the one thing that we all have in common with everyone and everything in this world, and in other worlds. I find it strange that I believe in life on another planet in another galaxy, but not in the intangible things such as pure human emotions. Not unless we’re loyal and loving to each other like our pet dogs might be like.

My name is Akamine Kyou, and I am trying to figure out a better way to say ‘I love you’.

Here’s what I came up for a translation for the song, EXILE – futatsu no kuchibiru [two lips/our lips/whatever.. I'm sticking with 'our lips'].

If you find any errors or have any suggestions please leave a comment. This is not an accurate translation because I’m noob and I’m no where near deep enough to understand these lyrics fully (LAWL).

I just translated it because this song drove me crazy and I had to find out what the lyrics meant… what Takahiro is singing <3…

Enjoy!

Credits to nandemoii for contributing the corrections :]

————————

I was my true self in the time I was with you,
Throwing off the clothes that were covering my heart.
It would be enough just to have our lips,
Communicating without words.

No one can choose which star to be born under
But when I’m here with you,
Where the time flows around in circles,
I cover your lips with my kiss.

If our emotions are measured with the strength of our embrace,
It would be enough for us to be lovers, yet
The maze-like town is like a passing miracle
We cry out without a sound

When our lips meet, the Earth revolves,
And we chase after the Moon glow.

Wrapped up in the night curtain, we fumbled, exchanging our love.
I’ll cast a spell by brushing against your eyelids.
Will these hot things get through to you
A soft kiss will light up this Fire

Our passion will show if we’re hurting each other.
By exchanging a smile, the the burning heart will soon cool down.
There’s nothing to hide, I just want to protect you.
Because in this darkness, there’s only love to be found.

The sudden rain wets my cheek in the place where I thought alone.
Because the times when we don’t meet are decided by the shape of our love,
Don’t be ashamed, but try to look back up
Because a smile looks better on you than a tearful face.

Holding onto a sweet secret that no one else knows about
We search for a scenery that no one else can see

If our emotions are measured with the strength of our embrace,
I know it would be enough for us to be lovers, yet
The maze-like town is like a passing miracle
We cry out without a sound

Our lips are pulled into the darkness.

*catherine

Romaji

Kimi to no jikan dakega hontou no jibun
Fuku wo nukusuteta no wa kokoro
Futatsu no kuchibiru sae areba jyuubun
Kotoba jyanai houhou de hanasou

Daremo umaretekuru hoshi erabu koto wa dekinai
Demo ima koko de kimi to deaeta
Meguriaeru made ni nagareta jikan kurai
Boku no kuchizuke de umeyou your lips

Dakishimeru tsuyosa de omoi wo hakaretara
Kitto futari wa koibito ijou nanoni
Meiro no youna machi meguriaeta kiseki
Koe ni dasazu futari de sakebou

Kuchibiru kasanetara mawaru chikyuu
Futari wo oikakeru Moon glow

Yoru no tobari ni tsutsumare tesaguri de kawasu ai
Mabuta wo nadete mahou wo kakeruyo
Boku no atsui mono wa kimi ni todoiterukai
Sotto kuchizuke de tomosou Fire

Kizutsukeainagara jounetsu tashikamete
Hohoemi kawashi kokoro no hideri wo samasu
Kakushitai koto wa nai kimi wo mamoritai dake
Yami no naka de mitsuketa ai dakara

Totsuzen no ame ga hoho wo nurasu hanareta basho kara hitori omou
Aenai jikan koso ga futari no ai no katachi wo kimeta no dakara
Sonnani jibun semenaide utsumuita kao wo agetegoran
Nakigao yorimo egao no hou ga kimi ni wa yoku niau hazu dakara

Hoka no daremo shiranai amai himitsu kakaekonde
Hoka no daremo mienai keshiki wo sagasu

Dakishimeru tsuyosa de omoi wo hakaretara
Kitto futari wa koibito ijou nanoni
Meiro no youna machi meguriaeta kiseki
Koe ni dasazu futari de sakebou

Yami ni hikare futatsu no kuchibiru

[Credits to http://www.jpopasia.com/lyrics/34350/exile/futatsu-no-kuchibiru.html]

Where would we be without them?

During product drawing class, I was inspired to rewrite the lyrics to K-Ci and JoJo – All My Life, because I am THAT karaoke deprived, and the song and copic markers just happened to click.. for some reason.

Anyway here goes nothing. Here’s the link to the song for you to sing along to [you know you want to].
Be happy it’s not me singing it to my lyrics LAWL….>_>”

Um… song is copyrighted to them ^, lyrics copyrighted by me? I fail at patenting crap or whatever >_>…

FEEL FREE TO CONTRIBUTE?! Group effort > my effort ;D

____

I will never find another marker,
More SPECIAL than you, 110 [geddit... special black 110...]
I will never find another marker,
More darker than you, oh 100 black
Oh you are so squaretastic like no other [tonguetwister line ><"]
“One mistake, oh what a bother…”
“Oh my gosh I need more colours…”
“How much more is there I wonder…”
From warmer greys to cool greys, everything,
I must get my hands on them.

COPIC PENS~
I can’t get enough of you
And I can just refill
When the ink is running low
WATERPROOF~
You’re perfect on bleedproof pads~
Yellow, brown, green, grey, orange and blue ooooh~
Don’t forget red and… black, violet too~

____

My stupidity ends here, can’t be stuffed finishing the rest of the song, haha.
P.S – red black and violet are grouped because they’re my favourite colours ^^… had to be done.

WELL, HOMEWORK TIME for me now… thanks for reading/singing ;D

*catherine

Catsby & Pucky <3

Finally an entry.

*insert typical uni art & design student rant here*

I need a life.

Anyway, the world is getting too small, I really want to move out and start a new life on Mars or even better, on Saturn’s rings. Come on technology… I want to go and befriend aliens already.

Mass production enforces the low cost rapid production method onto its consumers, and they receive a positive response, as opposed to the art & design world who believe mass production takes away the credibility of hand-craftsmanship, that each product of its own is individual and unique. Mass production is somewhat celebrated meeting consumer needs. Consumers get sucked into this via skillful marketing of mass produced things, therefore de-individualizing themselves because they’re convinced that they look so much better as a clone of another person, probably someone who’s part of a chain reaction of admiration. Society dictates these kinds of things.

Idealistically, if there was to be one of everything, and everything everyone used is different, innovation would’ve advanced much further. I have a never-to-be-proven, exaggerated theory that if everyone lived in their own little world, and had to survive on their own, they’d find their own way about it using their instincts. How they make use of the resources around them would be different, their sleeping patterns may be nocturnal, they might like to eat trees rather than meat, etc. What I’m saying is that imagine the possibilities one could come up with. We’re all individuals with our own way at life, though the concept of mass production is promoting a single person’s ideal to be reflected onto thousands of people.

[Yes I'm aware that if everyone lived in their own world, there'd be no babies to even begin with.]

I guess a more optimistic way to look at the idea of mass production is that although people utilize something everyone else has,and in the same way, there’s a shred of individuality somewhere in each of those ”clones”. Everything has a flaw, or an exceptional quality unique only to them. The beauty of it comes from when we discover those impurities and such. We gain a sense of self accomplishment and maybe end up cherishing that something more.

[I think I'm mentally preparing myself so that it's less of an unpleasant experience when I do end up with a shitty-yet-so-damn-common Hyundai Excel as my first car.]

I’ve started writing around 8AM, so excuse me if I don’t make sense.. I probably didn’t know what I was saying. All I was meant to do here was simply blog, instead I did a follow up from my 20th Century Design essay from Industrial Design Studio class.

I repeat, I need a life.

Thanks for reading!

*catherine

Warning: Long post. I did not proof-read.

Semester 2 is coming to an end within a month, and looking back, I’ve gone quite a long way since high school.

• From coloured pencils to alcohol-based markers
• From mechanical pencils to fineliners
• From cartridge paper bank/bond/bleedproof paper
• From -/+2mm tolerance to -/+0.5mm accuracy
• From manga sketching to technical product drawing
• From 5-10 weeks major projects to 4 week major projects
• From high school to university (LOWL)
• From staying within locality to travelling the extra mile to achieve something better

There’s more, but I can’t be bothered thinking.

One more thing. I’ve also achieved something I once thought was impossible… the ID favourite, [raw] EGGDROP!

I gotta admit, the projects that were given to us ID students could make any other fun-deprived uni student stare and glare in envy. But to be honest, I’m not sure if I can put up with next year’s work – the content gets more and more intense  each year, and I’m pretty half-assed about all of this. I have no self confidence regarding I.D WHATSOEVER.

Industrial Design is a big field, also very competitive. Doubting myself now isn’t gonna get me far. This isn’t a simple matter of ‘believing in yourself’ and ‘keep working harder’ for me, I don’t want to be spending the next few years straining my body, mind and spirit out for something I know I won’t last very long doing. This course isn’t for the light hearted, and I had to see to believe it.

By the end of the course I would’ve had enough of drawing and modelmaking, then come graduation I would run away, screaming, into the unknown… from the realisation that I’ve wasted three years, on something I honestly am not passionate about.

I’m doing pretty well in my course, but I’m starting to think that design is too deep for me to fully understand in order to be successful. I thought I was cut out for this, that I will be doing something that I love which is to draw the day away. I thought that if I loved to draw, I can draw anything and make it my career. Unfortunately it’s not that simple.

I love drawing people in anime style – my lifelong inspiration, to realistic portraits… and that’s it. When I pick up a pen to draw, it’d always be for that, never for product drawing, never for technical layout drawings which I had thought were just simply lines drawn with a ruler. Boy, I was wrong. I’d rather use my copics and all of my other ever so ripped off equipment for manga rather than product drawing. Life lesson: the way you sketch in manga is different to how you would in product drawing. The intentions for the same action of putting pen to paper is different…

Industrial Design-wise, I don’t have anything I want to do specifically to made a difference in the fast-moving design world. I’m not even up to date with it, so I don’t know myself what the trends and such are. What I’ll end up doing is designing for myself, for my own little world. It’s probably wiser to keep product design as a hobby if I’m only designing for myself.

Considering my circumstances right now, I should switch off to something else as soon as I can – I can’t see myself work in a studio. The way I see it, I’ll only be working in a design studio because I don’t want my three years of sheer torturous allnighters to go to waste.

After my high school graduation, I had so many plans for this year. Get good marks for my course, move out, cosplay at every single anime convention, karaoke karaoke karaoke, get a job, get my P’s and get a car. The life I’ve always wanted! But the only thing I’ve achieved is passing all my units… so far. What happened to the enjoyable life I had in mind?

Anyways my mum asked me the other day if I’m struggling with my course. I said that it’s alright, I’m managing. I told her I’m thinking of taking up another course next year and she full on supported my decision. She probably doesn’t like seeing me sleep late and doing workshop homework outside in the cold. But yeah at least I know I won’t get my ass whooped if I do change to that other course.

Bleh it’s been a long post and it took me two days to write this haha.. braindead. Well thanks for reading.

*catherine

I’m so damn bored today, I’m gonna give in to homework.

Yuh.. in the past few days I’ve had a few blogging urges that could not be fulfilled due to UNI COMMITMENTS. Now that I’ve found the time to blog, this is all I can come up with. Enjoy:

We’ve been working on this project for weeks and it’s really turned me into an obsessive perfectionist [and perhaps professional chromer... I can spend 9 hours breathing in toxic fumes per day]… 0.5mm now makes a HUGE difference to me. I won’t tolerate such inaccuracy no more!

Now that this project is out of the way, I have my life back again!!

Well.. actually no. Dammit. Got more projects coming up.

See you again, maybe in mid-semester break.

*catherine

Brendan the Rendering Block’s Name Anatomy

B – B[lock]
renda – render[ing]
n – masculine suffix, as opposed to ‘Brenda’.

Jung Yunho, give me strength! ><"

A person can work their way through life with a qualification or two. But the one I chose will put me 3 years of stress, all nighters and maybe no Facebook.. or even blogging! [my last post was yonks ago!]. And unless I am able to accept that, I won’t make it through my course safely.

For a certain qualification I am listing as a backup plan, it only requires a few months training or so. After that I’ll be all set to work provided I’ve passed. And the job prospects seem much better than what one would find in the industrial design field.

Industrial design is a great course and I was enjoying it so far, until I realized… there’ll be at least two more years of this. The pain outweighs the pleasure factor. Two more years of 1.5 hours travelling back and forth, spending my day offs at uni, all-nighters, spending endless hours with toxic fumes, dust and sandpaper… when will I find the time to get my P’s? How long until I will be able to learn the difference between a career and a job? Product design doesn’t occur to me naturally so I doubt it’ll be my career… I guess?

I know everything has its string-attached hardships, but some go to an extent compared to others. I love it when I have fun learning something new. I know I love learning something out of a good laugh. I definitely know that guys are not worth crying over, but it’s completely ridiculous if it’s over a course that probably won’t be your career after you graduate.

I worked hard to get into this course, but now I’m working harder to stay in it. Not sure how long there is to go until I snap. Others can endure much longer, but me, I always thought that if I don’t enjoy it, that if it doesn’t come to me naturally after multiple tries, then it isn’t for me. A screw-up that will cost me my marks is bound to come my way, I know it…

I’m losing hope fast for myself. I wanted to see myself at the end of all this, finishing Honours and start working in a studio in Japan. Now, I think I was a bit more sane when I said I wanted to be a nun throughout primary school.

*catherine

Having one of those "I LOVE MAIWAIFU" moments~

I know, lame title. But it’s the best thing that I’ve thought of today…

I was finding motivation to start on my projects by looking through my older artworks. I thought about how I was able to spend ages on them until they were finished. When I looked back to my current uni projects, I wonder why I don’t have the same motivation to even look at them.

But knowing me, it’s probably just plain lethargy. I guess it helps to find a bit of fun in what you’re doing in order to do it continuously… time to start digging through my project briefs! AHHH the horror.

MCAC Social Night was awesome! I got teary from hearing Konata’s dubbed voice in the ‘guess the dub’ game. It was torturous and disgusting!! ><” And it’s pretty interesting to see how many anti-yaoi guys just gather to see what a BL game is like. Not mentioning any names!

Other than that, futsal has started again. This might be the last time we’ll be playing together since some of the guys are graduating. The team from semester one has split into two teams: *insert the name of the Indonesian political party” and “Twilight Zone”. I’m currently the starting GK for Twilight Zone [the team name came about from our captain, who's a bit of a lost case... I'd say the same goes for some of us LAWL]. We won our first game! I didn’t do much -  it was the team’s hard effort in protecting the goals rather than me LAWL.

That’s all for now.

*catherine